Acceptance.

The shield that you have developed,the lie that you have embraced, is dangerous.
Why do you keep on telling yourself to let it go?Can you really? Embrace the truth,don't you think about it every single time you are sitting alone in your room staring at the silhouettes on the walls or taking a leisure walk down the empty streets in the hours of night with just the yellow glow of the halogen streetlights barely penetrating the heavy fog lighting your path ahead?Isn't there a voice that constantly tries to talk sense into you?

But you ignore it anyway,don't you?
Don't the memories flash past your eyes at sudden intervals whenever you hear something,anything, with the slightest bit of relevance to your subconscious distress?

But you block it anyway,don't you?

You know that you are guilty,that you are upset and sorry for what happened. But the question is,is it enough?

Being guilty is not good enough.
Being sorry is just not good enough.
If you want to get rid of this boulder on your chest ,then instead of being a vexatious pestilent,do something to douse it!Even after knowing that it is crushing,deforming ,changing you against your will,do you really want it to stay as it is?Isn't life worth another chance?

When you feel damned,let the numb tribulation wreck your veins. Whoever you are,whatever you are,feel it. Accept the pain.Let it force screams out of you.

And then, you are left with two choices.
Either put your hands into the mud and rip the weeds out from their roots,for once and for all.
Or,
Feel the pain untill you feel no more.Let it kill you untill you die no more.Watch your world take the shapes of your demons.

Regret is sure to follow.
But mind it,it will be your choice. Only yours.
Perhaps they will end up defining you.