“Having someone and losing him/her....
Is more cruel than never having them.”
Very well said and by my quote it may be clear to my reader what am I going to talk about. The best part of life begins when we fall in for someone but we don’t know the consequences because the feeling in falling is far more beautiful than anything else. But a point comes where the relationship doesn’t work anymore. Reasons may be any but it doesn’t work and finally the separation time comes which in common terms we call “Breakups”. We don’t realise the effect until and unless the anger turns into tears and the memories which once was giving you butterflies in stomach starts to hurt you. This is the point where you realise you have lost the person. Sometimes when you lose someone, you can’t turn it back forever.
Most important is that you have to be in love and not beg for someone’s love. Now, what is love? Not to just be with someone all the time but if somebody is filled with happiness this is love and it is essence of love. You start enjoying even when you are alone more or less like when you are with some. Why are we afraid of loneliness? Or we can say the part when no one is there with us. This is because when we are alone we have plenty of thoughts in us and maximum are negative and this is the problem. But what happens when you are alone and you get some adorable thoughts, you will start enjoying your company. The fear of being alone and that lost person will vanish as if they were never there.
Now when we talk about problem it isn’t outside, it is within us. What do we do? We do everything outside like friendships, relationships etc and than what do we expect? We will get happiness. And this is most impossible thing. Remember a person is not black or white, he is black and white. This means he has some things positive along with negative. Problem is we don’t want that negative we only want that positive and even this is not possible. Now when we talk about the inner us, we have controls in our hand which the outer world can never give.
Now when you lose someone you definitely feel incomplete and you again are in a search of finding someone to complete you. But when you start thinking that you are complete and that you don’t need anyone for your completeness, you don’t want to be happy with someone and that you are already happy. This is where world will start joining you and not you are joining the world for your happiness. Here what happens that when you give happiness in someone’s hands the take up control and you are a puppet to them. But when you are internally happy you’re surrounding like your friend, your family will start joining you and now you are not controlled. Make yourself like this.
Let me suggest you some perspectives to make yourself like this, first of all don’t give much importance to anything more than its value, in inside of yourself. Start taking things lightly. These things if you ask to someone who has still not discovered inside of him than it is natural that he will take up a stand rigidly and what happens now he is against the world. So, don’t stand rigidly for something. For example, when you face a breakup, you naturally start mourning that he/she left me and you’ll call a friend of yours. Now what happens after a breakup everyone becomes philosophers and even starts judging you. In this case, now think that you are happier before the relationship and make yourself happy by thinking this. Don’t hold the memories for long time just make them your nostalgias. Don’t let them rule you. I am not saying that you should develop hate for that person, just take him/her lightly and make them your lessons. Remember there no referee for this so never think that you did this and the person with you did not, because once both of you showed the same efforts and that was the reason you were together.
At last I just want to conclude that never make a person or love a person that much that he/she becomes god for you and you are like praying to them, remember even they are humans take them as humans and not your god and make them your world. So that when they leave you it won’t be that difficult to move one. Better be best with yourself.
“You have to forgive
To feel again.”