Is There A Right Way To Raise A Family?

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Lasya
Apr 20, 2019   •  3 views

Introduction

We cannot choose our family. Biological one at least. And that sucks. Why? We are the result of our upbringing and experiences, one cannot deny that. Once you’re older and you’re at an age to start your own family, you might look back at what went wrong in your childhood and think of something that used to bother you and figure out that you understand the other side anyway.

For example, maybe your parents forced you into your career. But now that you see how tough the world really is, you could doubt whether your resentment for them. Parents might try to do things out of their best interest and have it fail terribly. Who is to blame for that? How do you avoid that?

Which raises the question- is there a right way to raise a family? How do you raise a family? To look at these questions, we need to analyze what is needed for a child to grow healthily. And to that, we head on while keeping in mind that kids mirror everything, much like a parrot.

How You Treat Yourself

You might think kids are paying attention to Dora on the TV while you do your day’s work but it isn’t the case. Kids are really observant. They watch and learn and grow. So if mommy and daddy are fighting, they will learn from it.

Your relationships.

Take an abusive husband. You might think that by listening to him will keep your kids safe. They have their basic needs, your husband makes more than enough for all of you and even if the marriage is loveless, maybe it’s good for your kids’ future. You will see your kid mirror this in their own relationships with friends, family etc.

But instead, think of a happy, healthy relationship that’s strong with trust, communication and respect. This is what your kid learns from.

Mental Health.

A woman that refuses to take a day off, stressed and problem ridden is someone that just radiates unhappiness. If you’re dealing with mental problems and/or stress, as an adult, take care of yourself in healthy ways. Therapy, doctors or maybe just taking a few days off and remembering to put yourself as a priority also helps loads.

How You Treat Others Around You

To be a good person, it depends on how you treat the people and things around you. Much can be said about how someone that isn’t you is treated.

Your Significant Other and Family

If you’re calling you significant other names or complaining about your mother in law even if it’s behind their back, it is still an issue. Especially complaining to your kids, they are not ready.

People in general

It is well known how selfish people act. Teaching your kid to be good to those around him means doing it yourself. Treating help badly shows a lot about you and your kid might not know it, but they will definitely pick up on it.

How You Treat Your Kid

This is a no brainer. A lot of this depends on your relationship with your kid. If you guys are close, they will confide in you, making it easier to figure out how they are doing without going to extreme lengths. But what brings/breaks this trust?

It is up to you to find out what ways will help you bring you closer to your kid. Spending time with them is utterly important, after all how will the bond even form? This part of the article has nothing you should be focusing on; people are all different and interaction varies.

As a rule of thumb, spoilt kids come from parents who cannot say no and abused kids end up becoming troubled. If you believe in hitting your kid, it is up to you to make that decision but know that it usually becomes resentment afterwards. As for spoiled kids, reading up on developmental stages and knowing how to say no to your kid is good.

Conclusion

Of course, people are all unique and that means you might have a narcisstic mother or a depressed kid. Despite whatever parenting you do. The best rule of thumb is not to treat your kid like a project and instead let them be and flourish themselves. Be a guardian, someone to mentor them and help. Raising doesn't mean doing all the work yourself, it means helping your kid do the work themselves.

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