Unpacking Forgiveness

When was the last time when you physically hurt yourself?

Often, when we are physically hurt, we instantly run for a first aid. Then, according to the complexity of the wound, we choose whether to go to a hospital or sit back and rest. We are usually extremely proactive about our physical pain because our ultimate goal is getting relief from this discomfort.

But when it comes to our emotional quotation, we are apparently way more games for seeing just how much torture we can endure. We keep lying to ourselves about the existence of the problem. We end up, wallowing in our guilt and feel ashamed of ourselves for having an emotional discomfort.

This discomfort continues to grow in us and appears to be uncurable. It makes us hold back to our ill feelings. In the process, we begin to blame others. We try to find reasons about why our enemies are wrong and we are right.

We relieve our misery over and over again instead of letting it go. We do not rest until we have made sure someone else feels as badly as they have made us feel. We waste our time, by overthinking about the issue. Feeling angry and depressed becomes a part of our daily schedule which eventually makes us physically sick.

However, whatever happened, happened. Holding on will not change this fact, it will just keep negative feelings from the past alive.

The moment we decide to forgive and let our negative feelings melt away, we are on the road to freedom.

Forgiveness is all about taking care of our-self, not the person we need to forgive. It is about giving importance to the fact that our mental health and the desire to feel good is before the desire to be right. It is about taking responsibility of our own happiness.

If we are having issues with someone we care about. We need to talk to them about, how we feel without putting the blame on them and regardless of outcome forgive them. Our talk may bring us closer together or we may discover that we don’t want to hang out with them anymore. Either way we are letting ourselves free.

If we are feeling resentful about a person, we don’t care about. We need to free our-self and let it go instead of planning strategies to hurt them back. As it would not be of any good. Get over what they did and let it go. Because the longer we are attached to such hatred the longer they stuck in our consciousness, which will suffocate us.

Although, do not fall prey to the false belief that by forgiving someone we are letting them off the hook. Instead all we are doing is, letting our-self off the hook. Because forgiveness is not about being nice to them, it is about being nice to our-self.