there are times when being a girl child bothers me. even since I was a kid, I have been into sports and to know that there will be certain sports I will not be allowed to play made me so much wanna be a guy. when it came to going for early morning walks or evening walks, a family member would always accompany my sister and me, because it wasn’t safe after all. like any other family we all had certain rules for girls.
it was only when I had a brother, when I was 5, I realised a quick fact. despite all the odds girls go through, they always figured out a way to let their emotions flow but I felt pity for all the guys in the world because they could not. I slowly started realising things were different when it came to a boy, a man , my dad or my brother. it was never them who wanted things to be like this but it was the taboos in the society that were already set for them too. so all the girls who wonder if they are the ones being caged at home or they are not as safe and as free as all the men out there. no! you’re wrong, because men are caged within themselves.
a time where everyone talks highly of science, logic reasoning (thank God for renaissance) we are still stuck with the “fact” , colour pink; only girls. what is it with the colour pink that only girls can wear it? if a boy walks out in a pink T or a neon pink hood, its supposed to be what? disgrace to masculinity? there are all sort of names and mocking and tormenting. and why exactly, because “guys don’t wear pink” they say. but on the contrary when a girl walks out in all black, that is savage. does being a man not even permit you to wear the colours you want to wear?
affection, love and care. everyone in their lives deserves a little affection, love and care from people they wanna be with. I miss the times when I used to be in school and all day long would roam around with my best friend, hand in hand or those emotional breakdowns where I would not care about the world and hug her and cry. how many guys out there even have a memory about crying out loud, not caring about who so ever is around? girls you have all the rights to let out your emotions, wherever or in how so ever manner you want but think about all the guys out there who missed out on the best things in life. even when they were the best of friends they couldn’t walk hand in hand having a candy floss or cry a river in front of anyone. to hold back every emotion and live your life as though nothing affects you.
the guests arrive and the first thing happening is my sister running into the kitchen to get water for them. it happened so once, she wasn’t home and so my brother decides to get water for them and what happens next? boys don’t serve water, they sit and chat with the guests and mind their own business. helping in the kitchen, working in the kitchen garden, getting flowers for the vase in the house, making a painting for the old wall in the room, washing the clothes, cleaning everything is just not for them. it does not matter to anyone with how much concern your boy does it. it is not a guys thing and you just should not do it. that’s it.
while you grow, you start being masculine. the way you walk, your favourite flavour of ice cream, your talking style, everything has to change. sure a girl leaves everything behind when she marries but all their life a boy gives up a lot of interests to fulfil the needs of society but when a girl is doing it. its still savage.
the flowers, the pastels, the soberness, cannot be right for a boy. they are just boys not hooligans why do they always need to have black or wilderness or sports or responsibilities. why don’t they just get a break?
when we look at our mothers working in the house as a housewife, we are filled with gratitude so as to how much we own up to her. she is the angel of the house. what if our dads were the home maker? no! that cant just be. marry a guy who is financially stable. ok. but what if my husband wants to be a homemaker and not the financial aid of the family? will the society then accept him? will my family accept him? will my kids show the gratitude he would deserve? biggest of all will his family accept him? its a set thing a man has to earn and for a women it can be optional.
talking of the current situation, we see a lot of people coming out about their sexuality. we have lesbian and gay couples who are happily living their lives. then again looking at a lesbian couple is savage. when it comes to a gay couple why is it against the norms? cant a guy come out to his parents too? because apparently he is the one who will continue the family name.
movements like #MeToo came up in order to bring out all the unheard stories of women and girls facing molestation, rapes and harassments. a number of boys face bullies and harassments but do not speak of it because they are boys and they have to be strong. yes its embarrassing for a female to go through this phase but there are people who take a stand for you, but a male keeps it deep down in his heart and fights within himself.
why have we been treating all the men around us in a way as though they are machines? they have emotions, feelings and a soul too. have the courage to ask them what they wish for. tell them its ok to be themselves. they as a person matter not as someone what the society demands them to be. when they feel low, they can talk to someone. when they wear pink its their choice. if they wish to work in the kitchen its great. when they want to learn kathak and ballet its okay not to learn popping or robotics. if they wish to ride a bike with tassels and a basket its ok. watching tangled is as ok as watching ben 10. tell your boys to be everything they want to be.
after all the respect they treat us with, the gentleman they are, they deserve a split in the bill. not a ladies but men first at times. they deserve the right to not to be caged within themselves. my heart goes out to all the men out there. you are strong but sometimes you can be who you wish to be irrespective of what the world thinks or expects you to be.