The Second Class Citizens?????!!!!!

Before you raise those eyebrows , let me clarify. I am a proud woman and I always have been. So nobody needs to remind me of my feminity. For me the problem starts when others start to define feminity. The problem also starts when being a woman is automatically equated with being inferior in everything.

There are curious ways in which patriarchy/ inferiority of women is emphasized in a society. The best among them is the brilliant idea to perpetuate patriarchy through women themselves. Ever wondered why our mothers and aunts preach more about feminity and girlhood than our fathers and uncles. It’s not easy to fight with them. They are conditioned by the system. So our fights for equality will only be rewarded withlooks of contempt and the popular verdict“ if you are a girl, startlearning to behave like one too”

It’s hard to fight with these spokespersons of patriarchy but never impossible. Sometimes we may even feel that these all fights we make are pointless. But the key is to go on fighting for our silence will be misrepresented as our inferiority, submissiveness and lack of courage/strength/intelligence.

It’s very easy to find out the fact that the society is partial, patriarchal and hegemonic in its gender relations. The hard task comes when we try to deconstruct this for those who still believe in the sanctity of this insane system. How do we prove their belief wrong? I have spent years in educating my mother about her rights. But when she insists that father should eat first, that he shouldn’t do certain household chores , that none in the house should speak rudely to him....I feel my lessons wasted!!!!!

We are the enlightened women , in full control of our lives. Yet we hear many sexist remarks from our family, friends, colleagues....let’s just recollect them .

1. What’s she going to do with higher studies?

2.Bra straps, short skirts.. why are you so desperate for attention?

3.Did you dress up for him?

4.Is this the time to come home ?

5.Can’t you see those period stains ?Go and clean before anyone sees!

6.You are a girl. It’s so easy for you. In two years you can live off your husband’s salary

7.Travelling alone? How do you manage that?

8.You are 24..and not married???

9.Did you ask him for permission for the trip???

These are just a few instances. The list if continued can fill volumes. Because as women we get more instructions than praise/ any other thing. Instructions to girls range from “ don’t speak loudly” to “ don’t show your face to strangers” depending on how liberal the girls' guardians are. Yes for years women have been given freedom in charity. Many are fighting and earning what is theirs but there are still many who love their chains or who are too weak to break them.

Whichever woman you are, shout out loudly. Because the struggle must start from you and your home. So shout out if you don’t want your daughters in the same chains.....!!!!