Let's just cut the crap and get started, shall we?
1. When you disagree with someone, don't let the other person speak at all! Just ramble on about what you think is right and go on and on to prove your point. You will totally be rocking the “being despicable” game.
2. When travelling via public transport, NEVER make space for anybody travelling along. Elbow and push your way in and out, be the complete opposite of civil and shout at random strangers if they lose balance and fall upon you due to the brakes in a crowded bus because hey! People need to take care of their own shit even if it’s against physics for god's sake, right?
3. Treat waiters and other hospitality staff with all the disrespect in the world! Call them out with no politeness at all, shout at them like never before when they commit the slightest of mistakes and don’t even bother to tip them for their services because come on, they have chosen to help you and be at your service and you treat them like fellow humans? NO NO.
4. Don’t you dare stop showing off about all the things that you are proud of! Oh and make sure you boast about the stuff especially in front of those who don’t have them and yeah totally go on to make them feel very bad about it. This will up your game 5 notches not one!
5. Never stand in queues patiently. Who do the people making you stand in a queue, think they are? Outrageous, I KNOW! Always create a scene, never care about maintaining the decorum and patience should not even belong to your dictionary. Trust me, you will be on your way to the top.
6. When socializing, always pick out people’s faults and make fun of them. Show them their real place as no one can ever be better than you of course! Do not be surprised when people tend to call you Horrible Joe.
7. Internet is a lovely garden for people like you. Always bully whosoever you like randomly and that too from the comfort of your bedroom! There you are, cozy in your space with unlimited access to ruining people’s days. Orgasmic, no?
8. When somebody confides in you about something they don’t want the world to know, hell yes you go on and let the world know about it! You absolutely HAVE to let everyone know especially when it was supposed to be a secret. That’s how it’s done!
So there! Although there are more ways to reach new levels of horrible, I think these will suffice. Follow these ardently and see how you become the No. 1. Let me know how these methods have worked and also tell me how you have made Mother Earth a worse place to live in. Oh also, if this article offends you in some bizarre way( I don’t know), maybe you should look up the word S-A-R-C-A-S-M.
Cheers! Have a nice day y'all.