A Killer Of Dreams : Through The Eyes Of A Covid-19 Patient

A killer of dreams - that's how I would describe it. My friend in the adjacent bed thinks the same. Dreams that you just WISH had been fulfilled before you faced whatever fate has in store for you.

I first heard of the news about the virus back in December. Obviously, neither I nor my friends could fathom its seriousness towards the beginning because we thought it to be a casual virus that would be contained within the Chinese borders. After all the concept of a global pandemic, all these days, was only limited to books and movies like the movie Inferno where Tom Hanks rushes to Istanbul to prevent Felicity Jones from releasing the virus!

I am Mahira. A 20 year old. Not professionally employed but I did teach some kids in my community and made charm bracelets and put them up for sale online to earn some decent sum. Won't you ask why?

Because I, too, have dreams…

Although I'm thankful beyond words to my doctor and nurse for every bit of effort that they are putting to bring me back to my healthy state and for all the emotional support, honestly I'm not doing well physically. I've been here for nearly 7 days (guess I'm losing track of days now!) but my condition doesn't seem to improve at a rapid pace. My chest aches and I seem to have developed a mild fever that makes me feel dizzy. When I was ten years old, I had fallen off a flight of stairs and landed so badly on my chest that my windpipe( or bronchi maybe I ain't sure with the exact respiratory part!) had suffered a temporary blockage and I couldn't inhal either through my nose or mouth for five seconds straight. Late in the afternoon, just the day before yesterday, I experienced it yet again, but for a longer span this time I think. It is during such breathless moments that you realise how dear your life is to you and how desperate you are to hold onto it, no matter how harsh it gets with you at times.

As I lay on my bed now, a deafening silence surrounds me. Outside, it's pitch black. They don't even keep the street lights on these days. I visualise beautiful visions of my dreams as I close my eyes….

Dreams of making the most of this life.

Dreams of getting a glimpse of each land and experiencing what each of them has to offer me and realising how, irrespective of the diversity, we stand united on this planet. Dreams of seeing my Geography textbook material in real life. From watching the cherry blossoms and hiking up to Mt. Fuji in Japan, going for a daring bike ride in Ladakh, laughing my heart out as the Turkish ice cream sellers trick me, sitting for sumptuous meals with loads of pizza, pasta, tiramisu and gelato in Italy, diving between the continental plates at Silfra, being a kid all over again at Disneyland, basking in the beach and dancing my feet off at the Samba festival in Rio - i wanna do it ALL.

Dreams of having a beautiful house where not only would I have my family with me, but also some adorable pet dogs who would be my faithful and greatest companions of all time!

Dreams of getting to see the countless stars all over again at my grandparents’ town, that pollution (or god knows what) has rendered almost invisible.

Dreams of waking up to the news of a healed world all over again…

Tahir is a year older than me. He is a charming boy. Whenever he has spare time, he takes care of abandoned animals and looks for suitable people to adopt them. So nice isn't it? I promised to help him with this hobby of his, and he promised to become my partner in my adventures!

Although deep down, neither he nor I know what fate has in store for us, but we know for sure that we're going to fight as long as we can and keep our promises unbroken.

The virus is not just wiping off people's existence from the earth but also snatching away their unfulfilled dreams as if they never mattered at all. Don't be foolish enough to let it get you. The fight is not just ours to recover, but also yours to force yourself to isolate no matter how the restriction of your freedom is affecting you.

We have all heard Rajesh Khanna saying “ Babumoshai, zindagi badi honi chahiye, lambi nehi”. But now that I'm here, I wish my zindagi to be lambi, only then can I make it badi. I'm not giving up that easily.

I'm not letting a puny microscopic organism take me away. The fight is big. We have one life, and I'm going to fight to make it large. Are YOU ready to take the stride? Think about it.