If Sadness Had A Face....

I have been wondering how can I see if someone is sad or having a bad day, hard time? How can I see through their eyes and know that something is not right? What should I say to get the truth and not another half-hearted "I am fine'? How can I prove to be trust worthy, and am not another person who wants to judge them for what they are going through? What should I say so that they feel better, so that they can trust, at least me.

How does sadness look like? I wish I could answer that question. But I don’t know. All I know is, I am unwell, and I know many people who are suffering too.

How do I look like? How do they look like? When I am with my friends, family, the people I love, I am truly happy. Happiness is not a permanent state. I am happy when I see my friends smiling, and I am like I am so lucky to have met these people and I am so thankful for them. I laugh hard, I do. I cry often as well. I get angry too. I feel hopeless most of the times. But then I feel hopeful too. I feel like a normal person, but……what’s inside of me? A deep sorrow, something I can’t stop thinking about something that aches too hard, so hard that I feel like I can’t take anymore. Always a bit sad. Always guilty about something, that probably does not even exist. Always thinking about the worst to happen. But then why can’t I find anyone right next to me when I am all the time crying desperately for help?

The big smile.
A smile does not always mean happiness. Sometimes all it means is they are trying, that they are hopeful. And other days all it means is they are tired of explaining it to people why they are sad. Can’t fight to be happy anymore.

But then how does depression look like? Many have it, none show it. You wouldn’t know they have depression if you were going to guess. They just look like everyone else. We are like everyone else. We smile, we laugh, even harder. We think so many things are funny in a tragic way. And we love too.

How does sadness look like? I……I don’t know. It’s just there. Sure you can be happy but your eyes are always going to be a little bit sad. Looking into the mirror feeling hopeless, when anxiety takes all over you. That’s how sadness looks like?

How does sadness look like? Maybe its transparent. Maybe just the right people can spot it. Maybe people who suffer from depression can spot it. Maybe who hide it can actually spot it.

How does sadness look like? Maybe people should stop setting standards for illness. Maybe it’s not about how I look, but about how I feel. How we feel. And if you feel sad, talk. Talk to anyone and everyone. Ask for help. Do not fear be ashamed, fight for your happiness and never give up. Because I know you can do it.

I did it.
We will do it.