First Impressions – Ways People Judge Us

Our personality is a collection of our thoughts and ideas and how it is manifested in the outside world. It is reflected through our beliefs, our ways of expressing ourselves and how we behave in different social settings. As young adults venturing out into the world, we are now stepping out of our sheltered and protected comfort zone to explore horizons yet unknown to us. We meet new people and make new acquaintances in our social and professional life. It is high time we realise that our first impressions matter. People form first impressions based on what they perceive about our personality. Therefore, it is very crucial that we project the appropriate personality for any social or professional setting.

Here are a couple of ways people judge our personality:

1. Appearance

Your appearance is the foundation to people trying to judge your personality.A shabby appearance will make people think you are careless, uncouth, from a poor social background and ignorant of your own self. Having a good appearance doesn't mean you have to look beautiful.It simply means to appear prim and proper. It shows that we are meticulous, poised, confident and shows a positive and high social status.

2. Communication style

Your communication style plays a major role in reflecting your personality.Your vocabulary, tone of speaking, mannerisms and expressions are major indicators of your personality. People who stammer, speak in an extremely low voice or shaky voice are perceived as having low self-confidence.Speaking very loudly can come off as obnoxious and aggressive.Excessive verbal speeds indicate that you are in a hurry.The key to giving the correct first expression is to speak clearly and in a moderate speed, enunciating words as required and providing proper emphasis as and when needed.

3. Body Language

Body language is a non-verbal form of communication which is seen by our expressions, posture, gestures and body movements.Always maintain adequate eye contact. It shows that you are genuinely interested in the conversation. Excessive eye contact can come off as aggressive while minimal eye contact makes us seem as if we are hiding something or disinterested. Facial expressions must be monitored according to the situation.Never cross your arms as it shows you to be resistant to new facts. Avoid slouching.Sitting straight with the back erect indicates that you are interested. Always respect your fellow comrades’ personal space.A firm handshake indicates confidence. Excessive pressure will show a dominating personality while a weak handshake shows low confidence or lack of interest.

4. Interaction with strangers

Interaction with strangers, especially support staff is an excellent way to judge someone’s personality. Rudeness indicates a superiority complex. Talking respectfully and engaging in small talk with them shows an outgoing and compassionate nature. It indicates a sense of humbleness in the person.

5. Presence of red flags

A person will always look for red flags while judging someone’s personality. This may include anger issues, the way you react in difficult situations, your degree of compassion, respect for your co-workers – both superiors and subordinates, etc. You must always think before you speak and keep a check on what you say and how you react. If you give the person a chance to pin a red flag on you in the first meeting, it becomes exceedingly difficult to win them over in subsequent meetings.

6. Ways of conversing

When you talk to people, be it your peers or business partners, it is necessary to maintain a balance in the conversation. Talking too much about yourself comes off as being narcissistic, disinterested and selfish. Completely avoiding questions about yourself seems suspicious and extremely restricted. You may not seem as a person who is easily approachable. It is very necessary to be a good conversationalist to project a good first impression.

7. Frequency of checking the phone

It is always advised to keep the phone away when you are with someone, unless it is an emergency. It is extremely annoying ad frustrating when you constantly check your phone when in a conversation. It conveys a lack of respect, disinterest, substandard listening skills, low concentration and will power.

8. Repetitive or nervous habit

Nail biting, skin touching, fidgeting, and other repetitive habits are a strict no-no. such actions make us appear to be nervous, impatient, scared, overwhelmed or out of control. It indicates a perfectionist personality i.e. a personality striving for perfection to a point that it can prove detrimental.

9. Punctuality

It is very important to reach places on time. Tardiness indicates laziness, lack of respect and a tendency to procrastinate. However, one must keep in mind that punctuality is subjective and there may be some unforeseen circumstances resulting in the person being late.

10. Handwriting

Our handwriting relays a lot about the kind of person we are. Graphology is in fact a study of handwriting and a very prevalent field today. Your pressure levels indicate how uptight and restricted you are. Backward slants indicate introversion while forward slants indicate extroversion. Neatness or sloppiness can indicate organisational tendencies.

Our first impressions are going to play an important role in the way people perceive us in subsequent meets. Once a wrong impression is given, it becomes difficult to change the persons views about you. Our first impression will allow people to judge our credibility, our essence. Therefore, always keep in mind to establish a balanced and good comradery and rapport with people around you to help you live comfortably in the real world.