With each passing day you realize how much these little instances change you.
You don't shed tears for everything that breaks your heart,
Or maybe don't rant and ramble about that what's hurting.
A person changes colours, and you just thank that it was soon cause it being later would hurt you more.
You don't rip yourself off and beg people to stay anymore.
I can't claim if this is change or growth,
If it's for better or worse,
But it definitely makes you feel less alive, less human, very less a part of something, or anything at all.
What happens when you have to deal with a heart ache all by yourself?
You cry, you bleed, you repair, you recover and you revert back.
It's easier you see?
Now, what happens when you deal with the same heartache which three other people around you are dealing with, too?
You cry, you bleed, all in the inside most parts of you.
You pick others up, give them the warmest of hugs, ask them to talk about it and break down if needed and do all you can to make them feel better.
All of this, with tears rolling down your own cheeks, suppressing your emotions cause people told you,
people built this in you that you have to remain strong and if you fall apart, that
they will too.
I don't know how do you live with this heavy a burden on your shoulders with this soft a heart but let me tell you, you do it well.
I won't ever say those stereotypical lines that read 'time heals all wounds' and 'it will pass' or to 'be strong'.
I just wanted you to know that someone noticed the pain you suppress, the emotions you hide.
I just wanted you to know that you're perfect at it.
Perfect at being "alright" all the time.
But I also wanted you to know that sometimes it's okay to be not okay,
And sometimes it's okay to fall.