Valentine's Day

Loneliness whispered,
“Never knew, you would accept your past this fast.”
I Mumbled,
“How long can I Keep stumbling on something that’s left behind?”

Yet another mug of coffee slipped down my throat. The clock stuck 1.
The night was calm as the sweet nights of February wanted it to be.
My fingers circling the rim of the coffee mug.
Thoughts running wild, wandering over the grave things happened in the past…

The social sites filled with messages and posts of Valentine’s day. I pushed my chair back and sat there for long staring at the wishes and hearts flooding on the internet that day.

My Laptop screen went from bright to dark sitting idle for too long. Had been a hard year, since she left me.

I have gone through a lot of things lately but her loss was the biggest of all.
I still remember the day it happened, 14^th OF February … I shouldn’t have rushed her that day. 6 calls made by me continuously just to ask her to hurry and pick me up for my movie. I should have waited…

All the excitement and happiness shattered into pieces when I was called back from her number.

I shouted in anger, “ Kya Di? Itni baar call kiya, uthaya kyo nahi?”
To my surprise, a strange voice did the courtesy of informing,
“Accident hua hai,last number aapka tha, please aajaaiye…”

I just don’t want to recall the events after that.
I knew I have done a terrible mistake. I hate myself each day.

The clock struck 2.

I was late.
I had to attend Di’s Sepulchre.

The sweet smell of roses in the next room was enchanting and nostalgic.
I had brought them for her, last year too.
Di was my date that day…

I parked my car and moved into the fairly lit Graveyard. My legs wobbled but I kept moving towards the grave, almost numb. I remember the day she was being planted in this cemetery.

Planted?
Yes, She was a beautiful flower.
Alive.
Fragranced.

She couldn’t be buried here; It would be a shame to do so. Dead are buried, not someone so alive like her.

The clouds above moved closer,
looking so dissatisfied…
The ground below me grew colder as she was put down inside,
But the relentless wind kept blowing…
And for the very first time I ever knew how it felt to be alone on a Valentine’s Day…

I will talk all day long to her today;
I guess she must have missed me, waiting for me for so long each day and night among the dead.

I put down those flowers down there and sat infront of her.
These eyes went moist and I cried for long...

Happy Valentine’s day, Di... I mumbled again.