I woke up to humid blinding mist around me.
I rubbed my eyes and stretched myself and my body ached like I was crushed by 10 men.
I can’t be dreaming right now, the feeling was too surreal.
I waved my arms just trying to clear the mist around me, but in vain.
My wrist hurt a little but its fine if compared to the pain in my body.
Can’t just stand here, I thought to myself .
I try following the noise that woke me up from my deep slumber. I drag my body towards the noises which sounded like wailings and whining.
These were far more disturbing to me than irritating.
I try walking in the direction step by step with all caution. My brain still cannot register as to what happened to me or to this surrounding. It was both satisfying and scary to walk in this blinding mist trying desperately to analyze this situation.
Just as I got confident with my steps on the ground, I trip over something… or someone… I fall hard right on my face in a puddle, I suppose…
Painful.
Agonizing.
I turn over and use my hands to get back up in sitting position.
The pain in my wrist intensifies and it feels like something has pierced my body… A sudden grasp to my heart and I get breathless.
I Try sucking in air but in vain. There is a vacuum around me suddenly and its pulling air outside my lungs. A few seconds to this inferno;
And the air fills my lungs again and I sit there gasping for breath.
I take a long breathe and exhale as powerfully and painfully as I could.
And the mist clears slowly.
Have you ever felt that it was better to be in the dark about someone or something because the more you know the more pain you will get?
I FELT THAT NOW.
I was sitting there with an aching wrist beside the cold body over which I tripped.
I was sitting in a pool of blood.
The clothes on the body seemed similar.
The sound of wailing was deafening and the voices… recognizable. The barks and the growl shared the similarity in it…
irresistible…
Yes, the mist cleared.
I was sitting beside my body which lay in the pool of blood from my slit wrist.
The wailing was that of my mother and sister who sat there beside my body holding me in arms being pulled away by someone.
My dog whined and growled over the wailings from inside the house.
The mist had cleared.
I was no more alive.
The walls around me started crumbling and collapsing.
I went down the memory lane… the events , the arguments, the decisions and the guts… all that had led me here...
As the final walls crumbled on to me, and the darkness consumed me for perhaps the last time in this realm…
All that I was left with,
Were REGRETS.