Friendship's Don't Remain The Same Forever !

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Ritika Singh
Feb 28, 2019   •  42 views

Friendship word is a big word in itself and now has different meanings in everyone's life. I too have a lot of them but when I actually sat down a few days back to actually make a list of the few who will always be there I started striking off names. People often fall in and out of love ut have you ever fallen out of friendships? Life is just “so crazy.” And that woman you deeply knew and trusted, who has seen you cry and knows your story suddenly–or maybe slowly–she’s no longer a part of your circle. Left in her place is grief, confusion, a handful of what-ifs. You still refer to her as your friend, but really, she was your friend, and now she’s not.

You can’t peg what happened–nothing really happened–but you feel guilty and hurt and awkward now. Do you acknowledge the change? Does she even think there’s been a change? Does she care?possibly there was a falling out. A misunderstanding. Words twisted and changed, anger and resentment built up. Distrust, hurt, disbelief. A conversation and years of loyal friendship are unraveled and finished. In your hurt, in her hurt, there’s no follow-up. You can’t seem to choose humility or “the high road,” whatever that is. Time passes, and it becomes clear that there won’t be reconciliation. The friendship is over. Could this have been prevented? I’ve had this happen, and when I tried to clean up the mess, it exacerbated the situation further. Sometimes a friendship is damaged beyond human repair.

I've also seen friendships falling out of place when You either move away from them or move close to them. Likewise, moving from your hometown to another city for higher education or Friends Coming to study with you in the same place. Sometimes things dont go your way, but I'll surely say that the ones that survive these hardships are the ones you can always count on.

Then there’s the one-sided friendship. Both people were highly invested at first, and then, for one reason or another, only one is. The invested friend feels confused, lonely, empty, and a little angry–and the uninvested friend isn’t sure how to break off a friendship gracefully without a heavy dose of drama.

It’s either “What the heck happened? Why doesn’t she care about our friendship anymore? Did I do something wrong?” or “How do I end this friendship without making it out to be a breakup? Is there a gracious way to walk away? Should I just let it fade over time?”

The big question is" Should you fight for it or not ?"
I could tell you to fight for every friendship! and find a way to stay close! and put in all the effort! and push into the difficult conversations!–and I think I’d be right some of the time. But the harsh, difficult reality is that some friendships change and there’s nothing we can do about it.

All that said, for those friendships that can be salvaged, that can be restored, that isn’t out of your control–I encourage you to fight for them. True, trustworthy friends are rare indeed. Have a difficult conversation, be the first to break the silence, take steps towards reconciliation. One of my very best friends and I have walked through rough patches of our friendship, dark days when we were distant and hurt. In both instances, we had a hard conversation, forgave each other, and moved forward. Though both live across the country, our friendships remain strong and close-knit.

If you’ve struggled with changing friendships, you’re not alone. It’s confusing, challenging, and emotionally trying. Let us move forward with grace and truth, seeking closeness and reconciliation when possible, and finding acceptance and peace when it’s not.

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