Wildflower

As soon as we are born

We’re judged by the size of our bodies

We are told to fit in

So we may as well settle in

But self-doubt is like a declaration of war

Once we adhere to society’s norms

Within our own flesh

Self-doubt creeps in

And strangles self-love in its sleep

There is turmoil beneath my skin

I no longer want a touch of hatred

Upon my flawed skin

I want to love myself

Without feeling delusional

I want to be like wildflowers

They don't care where they grow

And the flowers that I know

In the fields where I grew

Were content to be lost in the crowd

I intend to grow

With or without water

And bloom

With or without sunlight

And raise above cracks of the earth in a sunbeam

I will flourish

In the way

I’ve always supposed to

The wildflower is a figment of my own imagination

I wish I could say that

I am to become one

To have the ability

To grow

Even under harshest of conditions

Leaving my old self behind

Blooming out of nowhere

In a land far from the madding crowd

But it is never that simple

This is a war I intend on winning

I will not let self-doubt

Limit my potential

And get away with destroying all that I cherish

I will change and so the parts of me

That I lose

Will always find a way to grow back

I may bend and break

But we don’t always heal

Healing requires time, and time is fickle

Pieces of me that were once dismantled

Begins to unite themselves

Inside my skeleton

My failures haunt me from dusk till dawn

Yet I fend them off as often as I can

I can’t allow my past to swallow me whole