Rugged Family, Rugged Kids!!!

“Rugged “means broken, rocky, and uneven. So now we can understand the meaning of the topic. If a family is broken, it gives kids with a same broken mentality to the society. Nowadays there are lots of divorce cases in courts for waiting for Judgement. Just think of their kids, how horrible their mind would be? No kid in this earth must face a question that “Would you like to be with your mom or dad? “ It’s a question which any child cannot answer. Some may say “childeren being with their mother is safe, especially girls”. Why shouldn’t boys be with their mother? Or Girls shouldn’t be with their father. It’s not gender that decides affection.

“Marriages are decided in heaven; we break them by our laws”. Then you may Question “What shall can we do?” Its okay your life your decision. What do we know what hell you have undergone? But have you ever thought of your kids what mental agony they undergo. Too difficult to say can’t be put into words or sentences. Have you ever thought about your kids that , “Is it ok for us to do this ?”they will say only “No”.

Then after all hell the parents get divorce, Do you think the kids would be happy after this to face the society around, they would always have a insecure feeling and they start going around to feel protective. Where the world would be ready to miss use such people.

There is a movie called “Oru Vadakkan selfie” in Malayalam. Acted by Nivin Pauly , Aju Varghese, Vineeth Sreenivasan ,Manjima Mohanand by many. This movie clearly shows that if a child is not given proper care and guidance, they will be easily cheated. The heroine(manjima)is from a rugged family. She would often feel lonely due to the fight between her parents and expresses this to a unknown facebook friend named Hariharan, slowly they become close through facebook and falls in love with him. Hariharan express his financial crises and takes money from her. This all occurs through facebook chat, and she believed him blindly because she felt he was caring and supporting her whenever there was a fight between her parents. After few days she jumps out off the house insearch of him. Then at the end it’s reviled that there is no such person existing in the name Hariharan. Hariharan had committed suicide one year before this incident. She was tricked by his friend John Baskar to earn money. He was a criminal, who tricks girls in online to earn money. This movie gives a good message that how we can be tricked if there is no proper guidance and existence of insecurity feeling.

Fighting infront of Kids le ads to

• Aggression

• Emotional Distress

• Failure In Relationships

• Health Problems

• Low Self Esteem

• Unable To Focus On Studies

Symptoms that, Parents fights are affecting child

• When parents begin to fight they become absolutely quiet.

• When they see their parents arguing, they start crying.

• Kids become sacred, when parents shout and yell at each other.

• They often feel Insecure.

• They will not mingle with anyone and earn a name "unsocial".

• They show signs of behavioural disorders.

• They will start blaming themselves for the fights that happen between their parents.

• They will often feel depressed.

• They may fair poorly in their studies or even in the co-curricular activities.

• Kids would like to stay away from their parents.

• Children will begin to complain issues like Headache, stomachache or other health issues to distract parents attention from fighting.

Now happened is happened, What can be done to help these kids would be

• Speak up to your child, about their feelings and the things happening at home and at school that may be bothering them.

• Tell your Doctor. Your doctor may recommend psychotherapy (counseling to help with emotions and behaviour) or medicine for depression.

• Your child's doctor may now screen your kid for depression every year from ages 12 through 21, with suicide now a leading cause of death among adolescents. Treat any thoughts of suicide as an emergency.

• Motivate your kids, They may feel low by comparing their family situation with others. Try to make them feel comfortable.

But all above this, it’s our mental motivation and self- confidence to come up in our life. Parents are our day to day heroes and roll model. Roll models teach both do’s and don’ts. Let’s learn the do’s and try not do the don’ts. Never compare our life with others everyone has their own problem. At the same time, Never go insearch of external care, because no one will be truthful and sincere like our parents in our well being and Never show that you are weak to the society.Whatever your problem is talk to parents openely, they will try their level best to give the best solution for your problem.